An official
government holiday in the world’s most oppressive global empire commemorating
the empire's independence from the 18th century's version of the world's most
oppressive global empire.
True patriots are
expected to celebrate by eating food laced with carcinogens, drinking too much
corporate mass-marketed beer, and burning a couple hundred dollars in noxious
and noisy fireworks made in China.
I'll probably eat
something free-range and organic and wash it down with too much homemade mead. And
if I find myself truly in the holiday spirit and feel compelled to burn
something in celebration of empire, I think I have a Chinese-made American flag
around here somewhere…
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